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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Will.i.am To Debut New Song On Mars

With the help of NASA's Jet Propulsion Lab, Black Eyed Peas star will.i.am is set to debut his newest single, “Reach For The Stars,” on the Martian surface today at 4 p.m. EDT, playing the song through speakers on the Mars rover Curiosity. What do you think?

  • “If anyone’s going to love will.i.am’s new song, it’s rocks.”

    John Amirante Expeller Operator
  • “Call me cynical, but this reeks of a publicity stunt.”

    Michael Brutsche Unemployed
  • “It was nice of them to wait for Neil Armstrong to die before doing this.”

    Doris Chostner Wet Suit Gluer
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