adBlockCheck

Recent News

Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.

Departing Bo Obama Lands K Street Lobbyist Position

WASHINGTON—Touting his lengthy tenure in the White House and close personal relationships with the president of the United States and first lady, executives at Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck announced Monday that once the current administration steps down later this week, the departing Bo Obama will officially join their high-powered K Street lobbying firm.
End Of Section
  • More News

Wind Farms Cause Local Warming

Researchers studying four large wind farms in Texas found that the turbine movement caused the average ground temperature in the area to increase nearly one degree Celsius. What do you think?

  • "That must be tough for all those people who live underneath giant wind turbines."

    Graham Branaman Systems Analyst
  • "Well, you get a bunch of turbines waving their arms about suggestively, things are bound to heat up."

    Elena Menuez Food Dehydrator
  • "This is so counterintuitive. It just doesn't make any sense. Why would Texas have renewable energy sources?"

    Scott Burkholder Floor Molder

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close