adBlockCheck

Women To Serve On Submarines

Top Headlines

Recent News

Jogger Clearly On First Run Of Plan To Turn Life Around

CHICAGO—Taking note of the man’s beat-up tennis shoes, sweat-drenched shirt, and ill-fitting pair of sweatpants as he made his way down the sidewalk, witnesses reported Tuesday that area jogger Dan Andreychuk was clearly out on his very first run of a plan to turn his life around.

What’s At Stake In New Hampshire

With the New Hampshire primary election Tuesday poised to impact the course of the 2016 presidential race, The Onion examines what’s at stake for the candidates
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Satisfaction

Women To Serve On Submarines

Sixteen years after the Navy began allowing women to serve on surface ships, the U.S. military has decreed that women will serve on submarines by 2012. What do you think?

  • "The first of those women will have their pick of pallid, hollow-eyed men attuned to sonar beeps."

    Chris Nix
    Mine Operator
  • "The first thing I hope they do is paint. The Ohio class has such a drab interior hull."

    Svetlana Terry
    ASL Translator
  • "The Danish have had female submariners since the 1980s, and their Navy sucks."

    Craig Jackson
    Staffing Specialist

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close