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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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World Facing Global Wine Shortage

Global demand for wine outstripped supply by 300 million cases last year due to rising per capita consumption, unfavorable weather, and fewer vineyards, with researchers predicting that the shortfalls in supply will only grow larger in the future. What do you think?

  • “Things will go back to normal once all the buzz around Sideways dies down.”

    Gabe Grimes Embalmer
  • “That’s okay. I started dealing with my problems anyway.”

    Judy Salazar Boxcar Coupler
  • “What about that XXX stuff I see cartoon characters drinking? Is that still in good supply?”

    Wade King Ichthyologist
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