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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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World Facing Global Wine Shortage

Global demand for wine outstripped supply by 300 million cases last year due to rising per capita consumption, unfavorable weather, and fewer vineyards, with researchers predicting that the shortfalls in supply will only grow larger in the future. What do you think?

  • “Things will go back to normal once all the buzz around Sideways dies down.”

    Gabe Grimes Embalmer
  • “That’s okay. I started dealing with my problems anyway.”

    Judy Salazar Boxcar Coupler
  • “What about that XXX stuff I see cartoon characters drinking? Is that still in good supply?”

    Wade King Ichthyologist
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