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Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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World’s 85 Richest As Wealthy As Half Global Population

According to a study by Oxfam International, the 85 richest people in the world have a combined net worth of $1.7 trillion, which is equal to the total combined wealth of the nation’s poorest 3.5 billion residents, or half the global population. What do you think?

  • “Halfway there, rich guys! Keep it up!”

    William Kleiser Nature Trail Guide
  • “Why does anyone need that much money? Myself, I would be happy just being richer than a few million poor people.”

    Roger Burke Web Forum Moderator
  • “Imagine if the wealthiest donated just one dollar a day to charity. That could work out to around 85 bucks a day.”

    Mimi Markovsky Supervising Editor
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