Would-Be Burglar Killed With Sword

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Vol 45 Issue 38

Troy Polamalu All Over Orthopedic Clinic

PITTSBURGH—Steelers safety Troy Polamalu reportedly wreaked havoc on the Tri-State Orthopedics Clinic Monday, flailing around wildly on his crutches and violently knocking over unsuspecting physical therapy patients while rehabilitating the sprained medial collateral ligament in his left knee.
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Would-Be Burglar Killed With Sword

A Johns Hopkins University student used a samurai sword to kill a man who had broken into his home. What do you think?
  • "If only those boys had kept a gun in the house, this tragic situation could have been highlighted in an NRA newsletter."

    Gil Pastore
    Dog Walker
  • "Maybe my wife will get off my back now about that trebuchet I've got set up in the garage."

    James Levy
    Furrier
  • "If the honor of his clan was truly threatened, then the student was justified in slaying his opponent. But if he killed a defenseless man, then he must be prepared to do penance via ritual seppuku.”

    Jan Karuschkat
    Box Maker
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