W's First Hundred Days

Top Headlines


Fact-Checking The Third Presidential Debate

Presidential nominees Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump sparred over subjects including foreign policy, the economy, and their fitness to hold the nation’s highest office in the final debate Wednesday. The Onion examines the validity of their assertions

Intergalactic Law Enforcement Officers Place Energy Shackles On Hillary Clinton

PARADISE, NV—Materializing through a dimensional portal in front of a stunned audience at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, intergalactic law enforcement officers reportedly appeared onstage during Wednesday night’s presidential debate and placed a pair of glowing blue energy shackles on Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton.

Trump Complains Entire Personality Rigged Against Him

WEST PALM BEACH, FL—Responding to his flagging poll numbers and a string of newspaper editorials and cable news pundits questioning his fitness to lead, Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump reportedly complained to a rally crowd Thursday that for the entirety of this race, his personality has been rigged against him.

Fact-Checking The Second Presidential Debate

Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton and Republican nominee Donald Trump discussed topics including national security, taxes, and their ongoing personal scandals in a contentious town hall presidential debate Sunday. The Onion evaluates the truthfulness of their claims

Trump Vomits Immediately After Seeing Everyday Americans Up Close

ST. LOUIS—His face turning deathly pale and beads of cold sweat forming on his brow as he took his seat for the town hall forum at Washington University, Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump reportedly vomited directly onto the debate stage Sunday night upon viewing everyday Americans up close.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

W's First Hundred Days

On Monday, George W. Bush reached the 100-day mark of his presidency. What do you think of the job he's done so far?
  • "So much has happened these past 100 days. Let's see, there was the Clinton-pardon thing, the Clinton-furniture thing, the Clinton-in-Harlem thing..."

    Alan Choudhury Electrician
  • "Has it been 100 days already? Wow, it seems like only yesterday that Bush cut off funding for overseas abortion providers."

    Danielle Ormond Art Dealer
  • "Oh, Christ. I'm supposed to have an opinion on Bush's first 100 days? Geez, I dunno, what all did he do?"

    Pete Terrell Cab Driver
  • "Since Gore really won the election, I've only been following what he's been doing these past 100 days. It hasn't been much."

    Rodger LaPierre Systems Analyst
  • "Well, he did lower drinking-water standards, revive hostilities with China, and endanger the budget surplus, so I guess that's all good."

    Mary Ellen Bolz Guidance Counselor
  • "Sixty-three percent of the American people approve of the job Bush is doing. Then again, 98 percent of the American people are fucking morons."

    Rick Dandridge Chemical Engineer


Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close