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Listen, Area Boss Gets It

PHILADELPHIA—Readily admitting that everything you’re saying makes a lot of sense, Greenwave Media accounts manager Bryan Mellis confirmed on Wednesday that he totally gets it.

Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.
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WTC Rebuild Delayed

Due to the office-space slump, it may take up to three decades to rebuild on the World Trade Center site. What do you think?
  • "Thirty years? Has anyone suggested giving up yet?"

    Connor Breegan Systems Analyst
  • "Oh, good, that will give them the opportunity to build that big memorial park the developers had argued would be a waste of money because the land is so valuable."

    Ellen Perroni Piano Teacher
  • “Can they at least put up one of those ‘Coming Soon’ billboards in the meantime?”

    Joe Horowitz Jack Strip Assembler

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