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Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

Voter Fraud: Myth Vs. Fact

Concerns over fraudulent voting have grown since the 2016 election, with President Trump himself claiming that millions of people voted illegally. The Onion debunks some common myths about voter fraud.
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Zimmerman Appears Uninjured In Video

In a surveillance video of assailant George Zimmerman from the night of the Trayvon Martin shooting, Zimmerman does not appear to be bloody or injured, raising questions about his story of being attacked and beaten by Martin. What do you think?

  • "Perhaps the Sanford police should consider switching to the Canon Legria HF G10, which shoots 1920 by 1080 high-def video with an optional 25p frame rate for a truly cinematic look."

    Darby Villechaize Home Attendant
  • "Okay, fine. Let’s assume Trayvon Martin didn’t attack George Zimmerman. Does that make him any less black?"

    Chuck Tyrrell Sanitarian
  • "A new clue! This horrific tragedy keeps getting better and better!"

    Peggy Lindley Unemployed

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