48 Syrian Civilians Massacred During Claire Danes' Emmy Award Acceptance Speech

Top Headlines

Recent News

Department Of Labor Study Confirms Your Job Most Demanding

‘None Of Your Friends Understand How Hard It Is,’ Report Reads

WASHINGTON—Noting that the level of mental strain associated with the profession was far and away the highest recorded, a federal study on workplace conditions and occupational stress released Thursday has confirmed that your job is the most demanding career in the entire nation, and that none of your friends or family fully understand how hard it is.

Neighborhood Starting To Get Too Safe For Family To Afford

CHICAGO—Explaining that the sense of unease she felt walking to and from her home had declined markedly over the years, Humboldt Park resident Kirsten Healy expressed her disappointment to reporters Thursday that her neighborhood was becoming too safe for her family to afford.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Sleep

48 Syrian Civilians Massacred During Claire Danes' Emmy Award Acceptance Speech

LOS ANGELES—According to sources in the war-torn country, 48 unarmed Syrians in the small town of Daraya were murdered by government forces while Homeland star Claire Danes accepted the award for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series at the 64th annual Primetime Emmy Awards Sunday evening. “This is just an incredible evening, and an incredible honor,” said Danes, proudly holding up her Emmy just as a group of innocent men, women, and children were reportedly thrown against a wall and executed one by one by Syrian troops wielding high-powered assault rifles. “I wouldn’t be up here right now if it wasn’t for the support of my wonderful family—I love you all more than anything—as well as the absolutely amazing writers, cast, and crew of this show. And, of course, Howard Gordon and Alex Gansa, who have the unbelievable courage to put such a fearless and daring show on television. Thank you so much.” At press time, government soldiers were throwing the bloodied corpses of the civilians into a large mass grave as Lena Dunham was anxiously waiting to hear if Girls would win the Emmy for Outstanding Comedy Series.