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New EPA Chief Proposes 30% Cut In All Carbon-Based Organisms

WASHINGTON—Expressing confidence that the nation would meet the ambitious benchmarks by the end of Donald Trump’s presidential term, Scott Pruitt, the president-elect’s nominee for chief of the Environmental Protection Agency, said Thursday he would seek a 30 percent cut in all carbon-based organisms upon assuming office.

Tips For Hotel Etiquette

Staying in a hotel can be a fun and luxurious experience, but it requires consideration of the guests around you. The Onion presents its guide to hotel etiquette:
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66-Year-Old 'Washington Post' Reporter Hopes He Liveblogged State Of The Union Right

WASHINGTON—Following his coverage of the president’s State of the Union address Tuesday night, Washington Post senior reporter Ed Karl, 66, said he’s just going to hope he liveblogged the speech correctly, sources confirmed. “The page is pretty long, so I think I did enough posts—how many posts are these things supposed to have again?” Karl, a reporter and political correspondent for the national newspaper since 1971, said to colleagues as he scrolled over a 300-word entry entitled “#SOTU 2013: Best Ways to Watch.” “I tried to put a bunch of photos and updates on there, plus some tweets and jiffs or whatever. I don’t know. Looks like a liveblog to me.” At press time, editors had commended Karl on his work and encouraged him to link to it on his Facebook page.

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