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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Adam Morrison Successfully Misses Easy Layups During Workout For Raptors

TORONTO—Potential No. 1 NBA draft pick Adam Morrison managed to not be in his usual excellent form during a workout for the Toronto Raptors last week, sending several easy right-handed layups clanging off the backboard and acting as if he couldn't figure out how to even attempt the shot left-handed. "Well, some days you have it, and some days—particularly days when you're trying out for a team that went 27-55—you just don't," Morrison said. "Maybe my poor play here has to do with getting adjusted to the air in Toronto, or maybe it has to do with the thought of playing for so few fans, most of whom think of a full-court pass as 'icing.'" Morrison said he will most likely return to form when he works out for Chicago, Boston, and Philadelphia, but wouldn't be too shocked if he had a near-total breakdown during his workout for Atlanta.

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