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Web Series Reaches 100 Views

A comedic webisode about two roommates became a viral sensation this week after reaching the unprecedented 100 view milestone.

Report: Gonzaga’s In Washington, Right?

NEW YORK—Ahead of the team’s first-round game against Seton Hall in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament, a new report released Thursday revealed that Gonzaga is in Washington state, right?

Teary-Eyed Robert Griffin III Slips On Draft Day Suit Again

WASHINGTON—With several tears streaming down his face as he stood alone in his bedroom’s walk-in closet, sources confirmed Wednesday that former Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III slipped on the suit he wore to the 2012 NFL Draft.
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AFC West

Denver Broncos

  • Strength: Excellent cornerbacks and safeties will provide sure tackling of running backs who are eluding the defensive front seven and rushing untouched into the secondary
  • Weakness: Keep trading for other teams' shitty quarterbacks
  • Player To Watch: Brady Quinn should have an interesting year, as he has been vigorously studying the Denver phone book

  • Intangibles: Whole team is going to see Phil Lesh and Bob Weir at Red Rocks after its week-three loss to the Colts

Oakland Raiders

  • Strength: Just nice to see them outside getting some fresh air
  • Weakness: As a team, every single player on this roster fucking sucks
  • Player To Watch: Quarterback Jason Campbell is an experienced loser and is not going to mope around and act all depressed when team loses eight or nine straight games
  • Biggest Question: If Tom Cable isn't fired during or after the season, will Al Davis get rid of him by drowning him in the Gatorade container?

San Diego Chargers

  • Strength: Unmatched at dominating the competition all season long and then dramatically losing in their first playoff game
  • Weakness: Nate Kaeding purposely kicks field goals wide right or left, as he hates football
  • Intangibles: Injuries on both sides of the ball continue to hurt the Chargers as players get stabbed with the points or slam the wide part into their faces
  • Biggest Question: Is this the year Shaun Phillips and Shawne Merriman get a consistent spelling on their first names?

Kansas City Chiefs

  • Strength: Quarterback Matt Cassel feels satisfied whether receivers catch or drop his passes; easy schedule as team plays seven games in the CFL this season
  • Weakness: Offense continues to struggle when trying to huddle up, with most of the players being overpowered and ending up on the ground
  • Player To Watch: In need of a solid season to become a potential holdout, wide receiver Dwayne Bowe is finally trying a little
  • Biggest Question: Will new offensive coordinator Charlie Weis actually explode after a big lunch?

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