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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

What You Need To Know About The Trump Administration’s Ties To Russia

New revelations from the U.S. intelligence community about potentially illegal communications between members of the Trump administration and Russian officials, which led to Michael Flynn resigning as national security advisor Monday, have increased calls for a wider investigation of Trump’s murky ties to Russia. Here’s what you need to know.

A Timeline Of Valentine’s Day History

Every February, people across the world engage in romantic traditions with their loved ones in celebration of Valentine’s Day. The Onion provides a timeline of the holiday’s inception and evolution:
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AMA: Plastic Surgery 'Only A Few Years Away' From Making Someone Look Better

NEW YORK—American Medical Association spokeswoman Dr. Marlene German told reporters at a press conference Tuesday that, after nearly a half-century of advancements in the field, doctors are now only "a few years away" from being able to make patients look better, rather than worse, following plastic surgery.

"Soon, a person will leave the hospital with an appearance that is younger, healthier, and more attractive, instead of looking like some horrific, pinch-faced thing from another world," German said. "We thank the hundreds of thousands of plastic surgery patients who have helped us get to this point. Without trial and error, and the inevitable freakish failures that result, there could be no progress."

Following the announcement, women nationwide made appointments for second and third plastic surgery procedures, hoping that the new techniques might eventually help them look halfway normal again.

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Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

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