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MLB Unveils Memorial For Runners Stranded On Base

NEW YORK—Solemnly ringing a bell 30 times for each of the teams that lost potential runs this season, Major League Baseball officials unveiled Tuesday a memorial outside league headquarters to commemorate all of the runners who have ever been stranded on base.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Submits Paperwork For Gas Reimbursement

LONG POND, PA—Hunching over the steering wheel of his idling No. 88 Chevrolet SS to closely inspect the odometer, NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. was reportedly in the process of submitting paperwork Monday to reimburse his gas expenses for the month.

A-Rod Donates $25 Million To Be Displayed In Glass Case In Baseball Hall Of Fame

COOPERSTOWN, NY—Ensuring that a treasured piece of the game’s history will be forever preserved for future generations of fans, representatives of the National Baseball Hall of Fame confirmed Friday that retired third baseman Alex Rodriguez recently donated $25 million of his earnings to be displayed inside a glass case in their museum.
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Amar'e Stoudemire Still Trying To Find Out Where He Was Traded To

PHOENIX—After hearing his name in myriad trade rumors, Phoenix Suns forward Amar'e Stoudemire revealed Wednesday that, nearly two months after the NBA trade deadline, he is still trying to figure out which team he should currently be playing for. "I'm guessing I'm a Cavalier now, but maybe it doesn't take effect until next season," Stoudemire said following a game in which he led the Suns with 20 points. "Am I on the Nets and they just haven't told me yet? I've never been traded before so I don't really know how this works. Please, say I'm not a Net." Stoudemire added that, whichever team he is on, he's looking forward to sticking it to his Suns ex-teammates during the playoffs.

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