Amar'e Stoudemire Still Trying To Find Out Where He Was Traded To

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Content From 2010-04-19

Law & Order SVU

NBC 10 p.m. EST / 9 p.m. CST That person you recognize from something else, they did it.

Opening Staff Rails Against Incompetence Of Closing Staff

ATHENS, GA—Citing a recent rash of barely mopped floors, sloppy register work, and general negligence, the opening staff of local restaurant Dom's issued a harsh proclamation this week, saying it would no longer endure the half-assed performance of the closing staff.

Sam Bradford

The Heisman-winning Oklahoma quarterback is widely regarded as the surest bet in a stacked 2010 draft. Is he any good?

American Punch-Up

FOX 9 p.m. EST / 8 p.m. CST Ponderous, leaden scripts are performed, and then viewers vote on which passages should be cut or tightened.

Twitter Now Features Ads

For the first time since its inception in 2006, the social networking service Twitter is running advertisements.

Sad Sack Purchases Screenwriting Software

AKRON, OH—"I'm excited," said the 36-year-old sad sack, who bought the popular program Final Draft 8 at Best Buy during his work lunch break. "I figured that if I'm going to give screenwriting a try, I should have the right software."

Kitty Kelley Pens Oprah Tell-All

An unauthorized biography of Oprah Winfrey by Kitty Kelley, writer of controversial books on Elizabeth Taylor and Nancy Reagan, was published Tuesday. Here are some of the book's revelations:
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Good Times

Man Considers Nodding Approvingly After Friend’s Drink Purchase

MEQUON, WI—Seeking to convey his endorsement of his acquaintance's selection at local bar Coney's Draft House this evening, area man Thomas Dodge told reporters that he was considering nodding approvingly at his friend’s alcoholic beverage pur...

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Amar'e Stoudemire Still Trying To Find Out Where He Was Traded To

PHOENIX—After hearing his name in myriad trade rumors, Phoenix Suns forward Amar'e Stoudemire revealed Wednesday that, nearly two months after the NBA trade deadline, he is still trying to figure out which team he should currently be playing for. "I'm guessing I'm a Cavalier now, but maybe it doesn't take effect until next season," Stoudemire said following a game in which he led the Suns with 20 points. "Am I on the Nets and they just haven't told me yet? I've never been traded before so I don't really know how this works. Please, say I'm not a Net." Stoudemire added that, whichever team he is on, he's looking forward to sticking it to his Suns ex-teammates during the playoffs.

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