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‘The Princess Bride’ By The Numbers

‘The Princess Bride’ was released 30 years ago today, and it has since become a classic beloved by people of all ages. ‘The Onion’ looks back at ‘The Princess Bride’ 30 years later.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.
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AMC Bob Hope Retrospective Ready To Go

WOODBURY, NY—American Movie Classics executives announced Tuesday that the cable network's week-long, 40-film retrospective of the films of Bob Hope is "ready to go," with "Remembering Bob Hope" graphics and hours of interview footage edited and poised to be spliced into the broadcast. "We're all set to air this uplifting tribute to one of the century's great entertainers, and will do so the second it's time," AMC president Warren Milacki said. "We're pretty much just waiting for the 'go' sign, if you follow me."

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