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Biggest Announcements From E3

Each June, E3, or The Electronic Entertainment Expo, hosts game developers showing off their latest products. Here are this year’s most exciting announcements:

‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Area Dad Wants To Watch New Blu-Ray Of ‘Spring Breakers’ By Himself

PAOLI, PA—Instructing his wife and children to stay away from the den for the next few hours, area dad Dave Landler has announced that he wants to watch a new Blu-ray DVD of Spring Breakers, the 2012 film starring Selena Gomez and Vanessa Hudgens, alone. “I’m just going to have a little movie night by myself tonight, guys, so I’d appreciate some privacy while the movie’s on,” said Landler, 49, while opening the DVD box for the Harmony Korine–directed film about four college-aged girls on a spring break trip to Florida. “It’s about two hours long, so I’ll probably be done in about two hours or so. In fact, why don’t you guys go out and get some food, on me. Maybe get some ice cream later, too. Take your time.” Sources reported the last time Landler watched a movie alone in the den was when he borrowed a DVD copy of the 2002 film Blue Crush from fellow dad Jeff Pritzker.

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