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Area Ford Taurus Thinks It Could've Made It In NASCAR If It Had Started Earlier

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Kevin Durant Wins Gold In Men’s Individual Basketball

RIO DE JANEIRO—Beating out Serbian Nikola Jokic by .87 points in order to claim the all-around title, U.S. forward Kevin Durant won Olympic gold Friday in men’s individual basketball, becoming the first man to win consecutive golds in the competition since Gary Payton at the 1996 and 2000 Games.

Michael Phelps Spots Estranged Father Poseidon In Stands

RIO DE JANEIRO—Immediately recognizing the booming, thunderous voice he hadn’t heard since he was 5 years old as he warmed up ahead of his first heat in the 200-meter individual medley, U.S. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps reportedly spotted his long-estranged father, Poseidon, God of the Sea, cheering for him Thursday in the stands of the Olympic Aquatics Stadium.
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Area Ford Taurus Thinks It Could've Made It In NASCAR If It Had Started Earlier

FREMONT, IN—Calling the stock cars in NASCAR "not all that special," a local used 2002 Ford Taurus told reporters Monday it could have made it onto the professional circuit had it started racing when it was younger. "If your owner has you racing from the day you come off the lot, it's not a guarantee you'll make it pro, but you certainly have an advantage over most cars," said the dark red Taurus with 88,000 miles and a small dent near the passenger door handle. "I was always naturally talented, but that talent needed to be honed and finessed. If I'd been at the track from day one I'd be talking to you from the Brickyard 400 right now instead of this driveway in the suburbs, that's for sure." Upon completing its statement, the Taurus was started by its 74-year-old owner, Sue Hampton, left to warm up for a couple minutes, and driven down to the outlet mall.

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