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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Area Grandmother Comes Forward As 'Banksy'

LONDON—At a press conference Tuesday, 89-year-old Rose Biggin, a grandmother from the Camden Town neighborhood of North London, announced that she was in fact the internationally renowned graffiti artist known only as Banksy. "Those drawings? Oh, yes, those are mine," said the diminutive octogenarian, who admitted to scaling buildings and climbing fences in order to put up life-sized stenciled images that satirize modern society's mores and its inherent political power structures. "It sure does help to pass the time." Biggin then returned home, where along with some of her "dearest friends," she sipped tea, sampled some nice ginger cake, and planned the necessary destruction of dominant capitalist paradigms.

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