ARIES: You will soon be forced to admit that your entire emotional range can be conveyed with a set of cleverly arranged punctuation marks.
BISBEE, AZ—Local man James Fitzner, 42, was able to successfully predict within seven seconds that a recent 30-second TV commercial was advertising Corona, despite having never seen the ad in his life. "I knew right away because it was really silent and the camera started zooming out a little bit and they never show the beach at first—they try to trick you," said the media-savvy Fitzner, who in the past has been able to identify ads for MasterCard and Red Bull before the product was mentioned. "Then, as soon as I heard the sound of waves in the background, I just said to myself, 'Corona.'" Fitzner's son David, 16, said that after the beer bottle appeared on screen, his father turned to him and winked.