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Listen, Area Boss Gets It

PHILADELPHIA—Readily admitting that everything you’re saying makes a lot of sense, Greenwave Media accounts manager Bryan Mellis confirmed on Wednesday that he totally gets it.

Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.
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Area Man Can't Wait To Get Home To Look Out New Window

CHESHIRE, OR—Assistant sales manager Steve Gregory, 37, told reporters that he has spent his entire workday waiting for the time when he can go home and stare out of his brand-new Pella "Architect Series" double-hung window, which was scheduled to be installed at noon on Monday.

"They have the best features—constant force balancing, heavy-duty cam sweep locks, and full fine-mesh screens," he said while paging through the Pella catalog. "Soon this will all be a reality."

According to Gregory, in the coming weeks he would like to get a dog so the window has "someone to look out of it" while he and his family are gone during the day.

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