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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.
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Area Woman Always Has Something Quirky To Do

PHILADELPHIA—When not reviving Victorian hair jewelry or double-dutch jump-roping with friends in a local park, Gemma Waite, 29, is up to something similarly quirky, sources report. "I haven't seen Gemma since Christmas, when she did the living advent calendar thing in that old building downtown, but I'm sure she's planning something just as unexpected right now," said friend Simon Chan, who helped Waite fish a Michelin Man statue out of a canal several summers ago. Waite declined to be interviewed, saying she was busy organizing a spelling bee.

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