adBlockCheck

Recent News

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.

A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.
End Of Section
  • More News

Bags Filled With Sand Still Most Advanced U.S. Anti-Flood Technology

WASHINGTON—Filling a large number of bags with sand and then placing them side by side next to a body of water remains the nation's most sophisticated method for flood prevention, a two-month FEMA study concluded Tuesday. According to FEMA's findings, floods—natural disasters that have occurred since the beginning of time yet still destroy hundreds of American homes each year—are most often combated by scooping clumps of sand into burlap sacks and binding them with pieces of twine. "Perhaps bigger bags are the answer," FEMA head R. David Paulison said. The second-most effective U.S. anti-flood technology remains getting in the car and driving to an area that is not currently being flooded.

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close