ESTES PARK, CO—Following their 24-10 victory over the Carolina Panthers in Super Bowl 50, the Denver Broncos held a championship parade Tuesday through an icy and treacherous stretch of the Rocky Mountains.
ST. LOUIS—A recent survey conducted by the Elias Sports Bureau shows that 98 percent of all National League base runners agree that Cardinals first baseman Albert Pujols is the "weirdest" and "most uncomfortable" first baseman to talk to. "There's nothing more painful than getting a leadoff single when that guy's covering first," said Houston Astros centerfielder Michael Bourn, noting that Pujols' palms are always noticeably sweaty whenever they shake hands. "The guy never looks you in the eye, and he never has anything good to talk about. Sometimes it's so uncomfortable when neither of you talk for like eight or nine pitches that even though you know you're gonna get caught, you just go for the steal to get the hell out of there." The same survey implicates that the Chicago Cubs have given up the fewest doubles in the league, which may be due to the fact that players rarely leave first base in order to spend as much time as possible with Derrek Lee.