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Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.

Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

Top Family Vacation Spots

With school out for the summer, families are packing up and hitting the road. Here are The Onion’s top family vacation destinations.
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Beauty Industry To Consumers: ‘You Like Short Hair Now’

NEW YORK—Explaining that the change in aesthetic preference would take effect immediately, executives from every major beauty industry company held a press conference Monday in which they told consumers “You like short hair now.” “You find short hair stylish and desirable now, and it is the kind of hair you want to have,” said L’Oreal spokesperson Bernard St. Jean, speaking on behalf of scores of cosmetics companies and beauty product purveyors as photos of women with short hair and captions reading “Women you wish to look like” cycled on a projection screen behind him. “The hair you like now is straight and closely cropped. It has some bounce. You like that it looks this way and want your hair to look the same way. It is not long hair—you don’t like long hair anymore.” St. Jean then closed his remarks by reminding consumers that they continue not to like how their faces look and wish to make them look better.

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Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

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