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Biden Co-Presents Best New Starlet Award With Shyla Stylez At 2015 AVN Adult Movie Awards Show

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Cannon Overshoots Tim Kaine Across Wells Fargo Center

PHILADELPHIA—Noting that the vice presidential nominee had been launched nearly 100 feet into the air during his entrance into the Democratic National Convention Wednesday night, sources reported that the cannon at the back of the Wells Fargo Center had accidentally overshot Tim Kaine across the arena, sending him crashing to the stage several dozen feet beyond the erected safety net.

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Virginia senator Tim Kaine will be Hillary Clinton’s running mate on the Democratic Party ticket in the 2016 presidential election. Here’s what you need to know about Kaine

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Biden Co-Presents Best New Starlet Award With Shyla Stylez At 2015 AVN Adult Movie Awards Show

LAS VEGAS—After winking and giving a thumbs-up to several female attendees seated in the front row as he crossed the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino stage, Vice President Joe Biden presented the trophy for Best New Starlet alongside pornographic actress Shyla Stylez at Saturday’s 2015 AVN Awards. “This is my favorite category every year—it always gets me hard as a rock,” said the vice president before listing off the names of the nominees and offering an open invitation to each of the erotic film actresses to stop by his room at the Golden Nugget. “While Uncle Joe’s personally squeezed one off to each of the talented and hot-to-trot nominees, we can only have one Best New Starlet. And the winner is.” The vice president then feigned difficulty opening the envelope, claiming that whoever sealed it must have forgotten to wipe their hands.

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