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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Trump’s Budget Proposal: What You Need To Know

President Trump has revealed his first budget blueprint, which contains $54 billion in cuts while accommodating increased spending on defense and security. The Onion details the major elements of Trump’s proposed budget:
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Biden's Handlers Suggesting He Forget The Words 'Pink' And 'Stink' Altogether

WILMINGTON, DE—While attempting to prepare the vice president for tomorrow night’s debate against Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI), Joe Biden’s staff members reportedly suggested he forget the words “pink” and “stink” altogether before taking the stage. “You know what, given the context of this particular debate and everything, I think maybe it’s best to avoid using the words ‘pink’ or ‘stink’ at all, and certainly never in the same sentence,” longtime Biden adviser Mike Donilon was overheard telling the 69-year-old politician during debate preparations this week, also reminding him to avoid any mention of “muffs,” “tang,” “cooze” and to definitely not do “the shocker” hand gesture while walking to the podium. “This is a very important night for us, Joe, and if you could try to stay on message as much as possible that would be, you know, ideal. Also, don’t do that thing where you smell your finger.” At press time, sources said Biden had assured Donilon he would do his best, but couldn’t guarantee he wouldn’t “pop wood” at some point during the debate.

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Trump’s Budget Proposal: What You Need To Know

President Trump has revealed his first budget blueprint, which contains $54 billion in cuts while accommodating increased spending on defense and security. The Onion details the major elements of Trump’s proposed budget:

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