Handjob inventor Fred Gilgoff describes the inspiration for the two-person masturbation technique.
NEW YORK—A major contest between two high-quality teams in a major sport is scheduled to take place in the immediate future, multiple media sources reported earlier this week. "No doubt about it—this is the biggest game since the championship, and it might be the biggest one we see until the playoffs," a respected analyst for a major sports news organization said Monday, echoing the words of analysts at most major newspapers and magazines, sports television show hosts, and radio personalities. "This will be one for the ages, one to watch, one to talk about at work the next day, a classic battle of high-flying talent versus hard-nosed grit. I can't even begin to guess at a score." Although tickets have been sold out since they went on sale during the exhibition season, fans are divided on whether they are expecting an upset or a blowout.