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Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

New EPA Chief Proposes 30% Cut In All Carbon-Based Organisms

WASHINGTON—Expressing confidence that the nation would meet the ambitious benchmarks by the end of Donald Trump’s presidential term, Scott Pruitt, the president-elect’s nominee for chief of the Environmental Protection Agency, said Thursday he would seek a 30 percent cut in all carbon-based organisms upon assuming office.
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Bill Clinton Starts Own Presidential School

NEW YORK—Former president Bill Clinton announced Wednesday the opening of the Bill Clinton President School, a four-day training program taught by the 42nd president that offers students the skills necessary to win the 2008 general election and become a successful two-term president of the United States. "Aren't you tired of not being president?"

Clinton asks in a local cable advertisement for the school, during which the former head of state is seated behind a computer, talks directly to the camera, and wears a hands-free telephone headset. "Only students who attend the Bill Clinton President School will receive real-world presidential knowledge from me, a real former president. Learn how to appoint Supreme Court justices who fit your political agenda, the best Washington, D.C. jogging routes, and tricks for enduring the impeachment process. People, the election is in six short days. What are you waiting for? Become president today." The Bill Clinton President School is located on 146th Street in Harlem above the Flying Dragon Tae Kwon Do School.

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