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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Bill Murray Shoots 18-Under To Win Pebble Beach Pro-Am

PEBBLE BEACH, CA—Funnyman Bill Murray put the finishing touches on six-under 66 Sunday at the annual Pebble Beach National Pro-Am, edging out Phil Mickelson and Jim Furyk by five strokes apiece to clinch his first tournament win of the season. "I've been working a lot on my short game lately, and listen, I've played this course enough times to know where the trouble spots are, especially on the dogleg left on 16," said Murray, who also pushed his caddie into a sand trap on the 12th hole and yelled "You missed a spot!" "I think the key today was not paying attention to the scoreboard and just focusing on hitting the greens. They call me a crowd-pleaser, and I did just that by playing a solid round of golf." Other highlights from Murray's performance included his eagle on 5, his masterful par save on the 15th, and the time he jokingly attempted to depants Ernie Els while Els was lining up for a putt.

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