Bills Impressed By Quality Of Toilet Paper In Visitors' Locker Room

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Vol 46 Issue 38

New Game Set In Michael Jackson's World

Planet Michael, a "massively multiplayer online virtual world" based on imagery from Michael Jackson's songs and videos, is being developed by game publisher SEE Virtual Worlds.

Bears vs. Packers

The Packers go to Chicago Monday night to take on the Bears in a rivalry that's as old and clichéd as the NFL itself.
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Bills Impressed By Quality Of Toilet Paper In Visitors' Locker Room

GREEN BAY, WI—Bills players were reportedly impressed by the quality of toilet paper in the visitors' locker room at Lambeau Field Sunday, enthusiastically admiring the bathroom tissue's durability, absorbency, and softness. "Wow, fancy," said running back Marshawn Lynch, gently rubbing a sheet across his left cheekbone. "They definitely don't scrimp around here. I hate the stuff our GM gets. It's really thin and rough and it hurts." Lynch reportedly urged his teammates to stuff their bags with the toilet paper before leaving the stadium.

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