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Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Benny The Bull Busted For Possession Of Unlicensed T-Shirt Gun

CHICAGO—Noting that the suspect had been taken into custody after officers managed to tackle and wrestle the individual to the ground of the United Center concourse, police confirmed Monday that Chicago Bulls mascot Benny the Bull was arrested for possession of an unlicensed T-shirt gun.

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.
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Billy Crystal Tearfully Admits He’s Never Seen, Been To A Yankees Game

‘I Don’t Even Know What The Yankees Are,’ Crystal Says

NEW YORK—Admitting that he could simply no longer continue living a lie, veteran actor, comedian, and self-professed New York Yankees fanatic Billy Crystal tearfully confessed Thursday that he has never seen or attended a single Yankees game in his life, and indeed has absolutely no idea who or what the Yankees even are. “It just sounded good to talk about watching the Yankees and going to Yankee Stadium, but honestly I had no idea what any of that meant—I still have no clue what it means,” said a visibly emotional Crystal, adding that despite having never once witnessed the Yankees “do whatever it is they do,” he continued wearing Yankees caps in public and telling people that he loved the Yankees. “I heard the name ‘Mickey Mantle’ all the time, and people seemed to like him a lot, so I just started talking about him too. But, honest to God, I couldn’t tell you who he is. I’d like to meet him though, I think. To be perfectly frank, I don’t even know what baseball is. What is that?” Crystal added that he purchased a signed game-worn Mickey Mantle glove for $239,000 at a 1999 auction solely to keep up appearances, and just wound up throwing it in the garbage as soon as he got home.


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