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How Movies Receive Their Ratings

Many Americans use the MPAA’s formalized rating system as a guide for which films to see. The Onion provides a step-by-step view into how these ratings are chosen:

‘Winnie-The-Pooh’ Turns 90

Winnie-The-Pooh, the A.A. Milne series featuring a stuffed bear and his toy animal friends, debuted 90 years ago this week. Here are some milestones from the franchise’s nearly century-long run:
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Bitchy Girlfriend Just Asking For Anne Hathaway To Swoop In, Steal Man Away

ST. CLOUD, MN—According to concerned sources, Jill Sagert, 29—a prissy, uptight lawyer who doesn't realize what a great guy her boyfriend Rich is—might as well be begging actress Anne Hathaway to walk into his life and scoop him right up. "Jill better stop acting like such a prim little bitch and start taking an interest in Rich's music, or that gorgeous A-list celebrity is going to win his heart when he least expects it," friend Diane Lineman said. "She better hope Rich never bumps into Anne Hathaway at a bookstore, because once they get over their initial dislike of each other and are forced to overcome some obstacle together, they will undoubtedly realize they're a perfect match." Others close to Sagert said that, unless she wisens up soon, she will probably end up with that sleaze ball Colin Farrell.

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