adBlockCheck

Culture

Oh Great, Another Woman Who Only Loves Me For My Complete Collection Of ‘Rurouni Kenshin’ Manga

Well isn’t that great—just great. Here I am, thinking I’ve finally met someone who’s perfect for me—she’s caring, smart, beautiful, and most of all, it seemed like she really got me. But I should have known better. Turns out she’s just like the rest of them, just another in a long line of women who only love me for my complete collection of the classic wandering samurai manga Rurouni Kenshin.

Disappointing Buffalo Wild Wings Not Living Up To Ridicule

LOS ANGELES—Describing the experience as a significant letdown, local diner Eric Tidwell told reporters that the disappointing Buffalo Wild Wings franchise he visited Thursday night failed to live up to the scorn he had long heard about the restaurant.

Louvre Curators Hurry To Display Ugly Van Gogh Donor Gave Them Before Surprise Visit

PARIS—After retrieving the eyesore from amid a clutter of unused display cases and movable stanchions in the back of the facility’s basement where it had been stowed ever since the museum received it, curators at the Louvre hurried to display an ugly Vincent van Gogh painting before the artwork’s donor made a surprise visit to the museum Friday.

Area Dad Needs More Time With Museum Plaque

NEW YORK—Leaning in close to the paragraph of text as his family continued on to the museum’s other exhibits, area dad and Frick Collection visitor Phillip Schermeier, 58, reportedly needed more time with the plaque beside Rembrandt’s 1626 painting Palamedes In Front Of Agamemnon Thursday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.

‘Our Town’ Cast Party Going Off The Rails

PEEKSKILL, NY—Describing a wild scene in which performers and stagehands were loudly conversing, laughing, and occasionally breaking back into their characters from the play, sources confirmed Sunday night that the cast party for the local production of Our Town is currently going off the rails.

Thieves Make Off With Museum’s Most Valuable Docents

CHICAGO—In what is being described as a sophisticated and well-executed heist, thieves stole nine of the Art Institute of Chicago’s most valuable docents in broad daylight this morning, according to museum and law enforcement officials.
End Of Section
  • More News

Blacks, Whites Put Differences Aside, Work Together To Make Better Burger

LOUISVILLE, KY—Sadly, in 2005, America remains a nation deeply divided along racial lines. It's enough to cause one to lose hope. But divided as we are, every now and again something comes along to remind us just how much can be achieved when we view our differences as assets rather than liabilities.

Brian Schickle and Malik Turner are among the many employees at a Louisville McDonald's who have learned to look beyond the color of their skin to achieve a common goal: cooking hot, delicious burgers for their customers.

The afternoon crew at Louisville's Carver Street McDonald's is just such a beacon of hope.

In a powerful and touching example of what can happen when people join together without concern for race, this McDonald's multiethnic, seven-person crew has been working in harmony for months now, blind to differences in skin color, united by the common goal of creating a better burger.

"Like our nation itself, this restaurant's crew is made up of a diverse pastiche of backgrounds," day-shift manager Ray Garner said. "But while, all too often in America, people tend to 'stick to their own kind,' fearful of those who are different, around here blacks and whites work side by side, committed to cooking up the freshest, tastiest Big Macs and double cheeseburgers possible for our valued customers."

According to Garner, in many fast-food restaurants across the U.S., black employees tend to cluster in the grill area, while whites like to position themselves at the preparation table. Typically, the result of such voluntary racial segregation, Garner said, is a hamburger that is not as good as it could have been.

"This sort of lack of communication between the grill and prep stations can result in the cooking of too many beef patties, which in turn can lead to the serving of burgers with insufficiently fresh patties. In short, the racial tensions that have simmered in the U.S. for centuries are still keeping many fast-food establishments from cooking up the best possible food for their customers. And that is just sad."

Each day, before the start of the afternoon shift, Garner gives his crew a pep talk to remind them what it is they are fighting against.

"I tell them, 'It's not about black or white, or my color versus your color. We're here with one purpose, and that is to serve our customers the freshest, highest quality burgers possible. Around here, the only color that matters is the deep-brown hue of a well-cooked Quarter Pounder."

"When I first started working here, I would occasionally allow my anger over American society's oppression of blacks to keep me from interacting positively with white co-workers," said lead grill cook Malik Turner, 19, one of four blacks on the seven-person crew. "But I soon realized that such resentment was not just hurting me, but also the customer. And that's a tragedy."

Prep cook Brian Schickle, a 20-year-old white, agreed. "When I look at Malik, I see not someone whose skin color is different from mine, but rather a fellow human being with whom I share the planet, a human being who needs to know how we're doing on patties if our customers are to leave as satisfied as possible with their McDonald's dining experience."

Apparently, the crew's color-blindness is paying off, as the restaurant's burgers are earning accolades from diners of all races.

"I don't believe I've ever been served so delicious and fresh-tasting a hamburger in my life," said Louisville-area bank teller Morton Wallensky, who visited the restaurant Monday on his lunch hour. "This is the taste of love and cooperation among all God's children, and I wish that the people of all nations could take a big bite for themselves."

"I'd like to think that what's happening here is taking root with our customers and changing their lives for the better," Garner said. "And when I read the comment cards in the suggestion box, I can't help but think that it is."

More from this section

Louvre Curators Hurry To Display Ugly Van Gogh Donor Gave Them Before Surprise Visit

PARIS—After retrieving the eyesore from amid a clutter of unused display cases and movable stanchions in the back of the facility’s basement where it had been stowed ever since the museum received it, curators at the Louvre hurried to display an ugly Vincent van Gogh painting before the artwork’s donor made a surprise visit to the museum Friday.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close