Boyfriend Can Really Envision Losing His Sense Of Self Long-Term With This One

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Boyfriend Can Really Envision Losing His Sense Of Self Long-Term With This One

SALEM, OR—Increasingly smitten as the relationship enters its third year, local man Jeffrey Winston is beginning to see girlfriend Karen Lompoc as the one for whom he could throw away any claim to a personal identity for the rest of his life. “She’s that amazing kind of woman who could make a guy give up any hobbies or interests of his own—even his own circle of friends,” the doting 30-year-old boyfriend said Thursday. “As it stands, I haven’t seen a horror movie, played paintball, or watched any sport in over a year. I could honestly envision ceasing, for all intents and purposes, to be, and existing solely as an extension of her will.” Winston added that he hopes to propose to Lompoc as soon as he figures out when and how she would like that to happen.