British Royal Family Concerned After Queen Elizabeth II Beheads 7 Tourists

In This Section

Vol 45 Issue 34

End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Energy

Advertising

  • Sports Drink Company Putting First Advertisement On Moon

    Japanese pharmaceutical company Otsuka has announced plans to put their sports drink Pocari Sweat on the moon in a specially equipped container bearing their logo, which, if successful, would be the first time a commercial product has been flown to the mo...

British Royal Family Concerned After Queen Elizabeth II Beheads 7 Tourists

LONDON—Sources close to the British royal family confirmed Tuesday that relatives of Queen Elizabeth II have privately expressed feelings of uneasiness ever since an incident last week in which the 83-year-old sovereign ordered guards to decapitate seven tourists having their picture taken outside Buckingham Palace. "She just doesn't seem herself lately," Charles, Prince of Wales, is reported to have said. "Wandering around the palace at all hours of the night, turning lights on and off, trying to disband Parliament, putting aluminum foil in the microwave. It's all a bit troubling." Despite an accident late last week, during which Elizabeth II called for all of England to fight off the Normans, family members claimed that she is doing remarkably well for her age.

Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More