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MLB Unveils Memorial For Runners Stranded On Base

NEW YORK—Solemnly ringing a bell 30 times for each of the teams that lost potential runs this season, Major League Baseball officials unveiled Tuesday a memorial outside league headquarters to commemorate all of the runners who have ever been stranded on base.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Submits Paperwork For Gas Reimbursement

LONG POND, PA—Hunching over the steering wheel of his idling No. 88 Chevrolet SS to closely inspect the odometer, NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. was reportedly in the process of submitting paperwork Monday to reimburse his gas expenses for the month.

A-Rod Donates $25 Million To Be Displayed In Glass Case In Baseball Hall Of Fame

COOPERSTOWN, NY—Ensuring that a treasured piece of the game’s history will be forever preserved for future generations of fans, representatives of the National Baseball Hall of Fame confirmed Friday that retired third baseman Alex Rodriguez recently donated $25 million of his earnings to be displayed inside a glass case in their museum.
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Browns Impressed By Johnny Manziel’s Chemistry With Bench

CLEVELAND—Noting that it normally takes several seasons before a tandem develops such a solid connection, Cleveland Browns head coach Mike Pettine told reporters Thursday that he has been extremely impressed by rookie quarterback Johnny Manziel’s growing chemistry with the team bench. “They haven’t had much time together yet, but Johnny is really beginning to gel with our bench,” said Pettine, adding that the Browns coaching staff has been incredibly pleased to see the ease and comfort with which their first-year signal caller has worked with the bench during practices and preseason games. “You can tell there’s a genuine sense of trust and a truly unspoken bond between the two. It’s a very natural relationship, and we’re very excited to see how it grows—so far, they’ve been practically inseparable.” Pettine added that given the way Manziel has clicked with the bench thus far, he believes the two have the potential to eventually become the Browns’ most prolific quarterback-bench tandem since the Brady Quinn era.

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