adBlockCheck

Bruce Springsteen On Fence About Playing Assad’s Birthday Gig

Top Headlines

Entertainment

Director Has Clear Vision Of How Studio Will Destroy Movie

LOS ANGELES—Saying he can already picture exactly what the finished cut will look like on the big screen, Hollywood film director Paul Stanton told reporters Wednesday he has a clear vision of how studio executives will totally destroy his upcoming movie.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 14, 2016

ARIES: Once the laughter dies down, the party favors are put away, and the monkeys led back inside their cages, you’ll finally be given a chance to explain your side of the story.

Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Bruce Springsteen On Fence About Playing Assad’s Birthday Gig

RUMSON, NJ­—Sources close to Bruce Springsteen confirmed yesterday that the rock legend continues to have mixed feelings about accepting an invitation to perform at Syrian president Bashar al-Assad’s upcoming 48th birthday party. “I mean, he’s a big fan, and the money’s good, so it’s a close call, ya know?” Springsteen reportedly said of the upcoming gig, in which the 63-year-old musician would be expected to play a 45-minute set with the The E Street Band at the Presidential Palace before al-Assad, his family, and several high-ranking military officers. “Besides, I kind of accepted over the phone when he asked, so the rest of the band is already over there right now. It sucks, but it might be the kind of thing where you just have to grit your teeth, go out there, and get it over with. Will it be my finest moment? No, but 200 grand is 200 grand.” Springsteen added that if he does ultimately decide to play the party, he’s thinking of opening with “Badlands” into “The Ties That Bind” and then closing with an extended jam on “Tenth Avenue Freeze-Out.”

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close