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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Cage Match Settles Nothing

PONTIAC, MI—The long-awaited steel-cage match between World Championship Wrestling rivals Violator and Psycho Sid, widely expected to settle a bitter dispute between the two, settled nothing Monday. "After all the accusations and insults exchanged between these men, I really had high hopes that this cage match would, at long last, provide some resolution and maybe even a sense of closure," WCW fan Jordan Bumpers said. "Yet, strangely, I feel like they're no closer to understanding each other's point of view than before they entered the cage." Psycho Sid, who lost the match by disqualification, continues to insist that he is the superior wrestler, a claim with which Violator vehemently disagreed.

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