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MLB Unveils Memorial For Runners Stranded On Base

NEW YORK—Solemnly ringing a bell 30 times for each of the teams that lost potential runs this season, Major League Baseball officials unveiled Tuesday a memorial outside league headquarters to commemorate all of the runners who have ever been stranded on base.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Submits Paperwork For Gas Reimbursement

LONG POND, PA—Hunching over the steering wheel of his idling No. 88 Chevrolet SS to closely inspect the odometer, NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. was reportedly in the process of submitting paperwork Monday to reimburse his gas expenses for the month.

A-Rod Donates $25 Million To Be Displayed In Glass Case In Baseball Hall Of Fame

COOPERSTOWN, NY—Ensuring that a treasured piece of the game’s history will be forever preserved for future generations of fans, representatives of the National Baseball Hall of Fame confirmed Friday that retired third baseman Alex Rodriguez recently donated $25 million of his earnings to be displayed inside a glass case in their museum.
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Cardinals To Donate $1,000 To Charity Every Time John Lackey Hits A Batter

ST. LOUIS—As part of their ongoing effort to give back to the community, the St. Louis Cardinals announced Friday that the team will be donating $1,000 to charity for every batter that starting right-hander John Lackey hits with a pitch. “The Cardinals organization has always sought to lend a hand to those in need, so in that spirit, we will now be contributing to a number of national and local charities every time John plunks someone on the numbers,” Cardinals team president Bill DeWitt III told reporters, noting that the initiative will run through the end of the season, with the ultimate goal of $50,000 raised for good causes. “Whether John tags a batter in the back, beans him right on the helmet, or even just hits his arm with a pitch that’s high and inside, we’ll be writing a check. We hope these worthy charities will be able to do a lot of good with this money, and we’re fully confident that John will do his part.” DeWitt went on to say that the franchise would also be pledging $10,000 to the St. Louis Children’s Hospital every time a player on the opposing team charges the mound and sparks a bench-clearing brawl.

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