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Cartoon Peppers On Menu A Foreboding Warning To All Who Would Dare Order Spicy Entrees

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CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

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Cartoon Peppers On Menu A Foreboding Warning To All Who Would Dare Order Spicy Entrees

CORAL SPRINGS, FL—Hovering forbiddingly to the right of several entrees, a handful of cartoon red chili peppers served as dark and chilling omens to all who would dare order spicy food items off the menu at Mexican restaurant Casa Azteca, sources confirmed Wednesday. According to reports, a single grim pepper reportedly loomed near the Chiles Relleno, signifying danger to any customer foolhardy enough to select the ominously piquant combination of battered poblanos and cheese. Sources further indicated that patrons would be wise to not even look upon the accursed Tilapia a la Diabla, which, with its baleful row of three clip-art portents, reportedly promised unspeakable woe and ruination even to those who had withstood other spicy entrees. At press time, most customers had sensibly heeded the sinister chili auguries and selected house specials marked with a cheery and comforting chef’s hat.

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