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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.
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Catherine Zeta-Jones Happy To See People On Internet Would Still Hit That

NEW YORK—Forty-one-year-old actress Catherine Zeta-Jones told reporters Sunday she was "quite pleased" to know a majority of Internet commenters would totally still hit that. "At this point in my career, it's encouraging to see that Devin808 would still tap my ass if he had the chance, and I was flattered when HandyMan14 said that, even though I'm not as hot now as I was in High Fidelity, he definitely wouldn't mind tearing me apart until I could barely walk," a smiling Zeta-Jones said. "CowboysFan93 was really specific about how he'd like to choke me with his cock, which, as an actress now in her 40s, really brightened my day." At press time, Zeta-Jones' husband Michael Douglas was reportedly searching for any type of Internet comment speculating on the size of his penis.

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