Celebrity Smell-Alike Sweats Just Like Alec Baldwin

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Vol 46 Issue 13

NBA To Start Charging Teams For Free Throws

NEW YORK—In an effort to increase the league's revenue and offset the expensive cost of foul shots, commissioner David Stern announced Monday that the NBA would begin charging teams a $50 fee per free throw attempt.

Chimp In Cocaine Study Starts Lying To Friends

ATLANTA—Early in the study, Bobo's elevated mood and excessive chattering made him quite popular among the other chimpanzees. But researchers claimed that his increased irritability, short temper, and absenteeism at the jungle gym did not go unnoticed.
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Celebrity Smell-Alike Sweats Just Like Alec Baldwin

TOPEKA, KS—Friends, family, and workout partners of Ted Granding stated this week that the 35-year-old paralegal is a dead whiffer for popular film and television actor Alec Baldwin. "Seriously, if Ted and Alec came back from jogging together, you wouldn't be able to smell them apart," coworker Paul Eastman said. "I've seen people spin around because they think Alec Baldwin just walked in, and then look around the room in confusion. If there were an agency for people who smell famous, Ted could make a new career out of this." For his part, Granding said he did not smell the resemblance to Baldwin, though he claimed that from certain angles he smells like a cross between Sam Rockwell and Sigourney Weaver.

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