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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Chicago Blackhawks Relatively Silence Boston Fans

BOSTON—In a thrilling conclusion to the NHL Finals, the Chicago Blackhawks defeated the Boston Bruins in Game 6 of the championship series Monday night, securing the Stanley Cup for Chicago in a stunning win that hockey analysts agreed somewhat silenced Boston’s typically vocal fan base. “Having to watch the Blackhawks hoist the Cup on the Bruins’ home ice really quieted this crowd, to the extent that these people can be quieted,” said ESPN hockey commentator Barry Melrose, adding that after the final horn sounded in TD Garden, you could just about hear a pin drop, in a sense. “This defeat has left Bostonians at a loss for words, comparatively. After last night, something tells me we won’t be hearing a peep out of Bruin diehards for at least a few seconds.” When contacted by reporters, Boston residents more or less declined to comment.

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