adBlockCheck

Chris Bosh's Frightening Night Locked In A Hot Car

Top Headlines

Sports

Report: Gonzaga’s In Washington, Right?

NEW YORK—Ahead of the team’s first-round game against Seton Hall in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament, a new report released Thursday revealed that Gonzaga is in Washington state, right?

Teary-Eyed Robert Griffin III Slips On Draft Day Suit Again

WASHINGTON—With several tears streaming down his face as he stood alone in his bedroom’s walk-in closet, sources confirmed Wednesday that former Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III slipped on the suit he wore to the 2012 NFL Draft.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Chris Bosh's Frightening Night Locked In A Hot Car

Police were called to a Miami-area nightclub late last night to respond to reports that Heat forward Chris Bosh was left alone in a hot car for hours while his teammates LeBron James and Dwyane Wade partied inside, without a thought to their highly-paid sidekick. Experts are now saying that the Heat are likely to lose custody of the vulnerable Bosh, an outcome made more likely by the duo's history of neglecting Bosh and their other teammates. Here are some of their most notorious incidents of neglect:

  • Center Zydrunas Ilgauskas gets tangled up in a camera cord during a game against the Bulls and nearly strangles himself because no one was watching him.
  • Sharpshooter Mike Miller misses 30 games when Wade forgets he promised to drive Miller to the stadium and Miller gets lost on a city bus.
  • Bosh almost drowns in a closed hotel pool one night after midnight when James and Wade go out without him and Bosh climbs out onto his balcony.
  • The fire department has to be called when Mario Chalmers climbs out onto the rafters in the American Airlines Arena for attention but is too scared to climb back down.
  • Left to his own devices during a six-game homestand, Udonis Haslem eats nothing but soda and candy and has to be taken to the hospital and have his stomach pumped.
  • After James and Wade tell Bosh to "quit bugging us and look after yourself for a change," Bosh goes two weeks without bathing because he "doesn't know how."

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close