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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 31, 2017

Aries: They say there’s nothing quite like the bond between a mother and her child, but then they have yet to see your experimental new adhesive compound. Taurus: The stars, in their infinite wisdom, recommend that you check yourself this week, as not doing so might lead you to wreck yourself in the future.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 24, 2017

Aquarius No offense, but when got into this business, dealing with empty and meaningless futures like yours sure as hell wasn’t what it had in mind. Pisces Though you’ve been told that dressing up once in a while wouldn’t kill you, the coroner’s report this week will contain evidence to the contrary.
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Chris Kattan Wondering Whether He Should Start A Podcast

LOS ANGELES—Citing the freedom of the form, the popularity of shows such as WTF With Marc Maron and The Joe Rogan Experience, and the likelihood that his fans would be excited to hear what he’s been up to lately, former Saturday Night Live cast member Chris Kattan wondered aloud Wednesday whether he should start his own podcast. "I could call up some old friends like Darrell Hammond and Rachel Dratch—I'm sure they'd totally be into coming on as guests," Kattan said of his possible foray into podcasting, which he told reporters he envisioned as "an interview show with some comedy elements." "And I bet people would love to catch up with [Kattan's SNL characters] Mango, Mr. Peepers, and Gay Hitler. You know, if I clear some of the boxes and other stuff out of the basement and grab that card table out of the garage, I could set up a really sweet little home studio down there." Kattan was reportedly spotted later that day pricing low-end mixing boards at a North Hollywood Guitar Center location.

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