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Christian Rock Uninspired

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Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Christian Rock Uninspired

BEATRICE, NE—Here Comes The Son (Of God), the latest album by Christian rock band Fisherz Of Men, is being panned by Nebraska Christian-rock critics as passionless and uninspired. "This effort, if it can be called that, is nothing more than shallow feel-good meanderings and phoned-in musicianship," said critic Kevin Ames. "The questionable 'Drinking In Remembrance' and the tepid 'hard rock' cover of 'Lord I Lift Your Name On High' haven't got a prayer of winning new converts." Lead singer Seth Jago admitted that the band has been "going through a real personal Gethsemane."

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