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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

What You Need To Know About The Trump Administration’s Ties To Russia

New revelations from the U.S. intelligence community about potentially illegal communications between members of the Trump administration and Russian officials, which led to Michael Flynn resigning as national security advisor Monday, have increased calls for a wider investigation of Trump’s murky ties to Russia. Here’s what you need to know.

A Timeline Of Valentine’s Day History

Every February, people across the world engage in romantic traditions with their loved ones in celebration of Valentine’s Day. The Onion provides a timeline of the holiday’s inception and evolution:
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Clear Theme Of Obedient Children Emerging In Father’s Bedtime Stories

HUMBOLDT, TN—Citing recent tales such as “Hank the Homework-Before-Dessert Dog,” “Elmer the Don’t-Talk-Back Parrot,” and “Hard Work Is Its Own Reward,” 8-year-old Travis Ferland told reporters Wednesday the theme of obedient children had begun to recur in his father’s bedtime stories. “In last night’s story, Ricky the Raccoon was almost to Pinecone Castle to rescue Princess Porcupine when he suddenly turned around and went home because he realized he had forgotten to ask his dad for permission to go outside,” said Travis, noting that his father had also recently introduced a human character named “Travvie” who, because he wishes to be a big help to his father, chooses to rake leaves without receiving an allowance. “At least it was better than the one about the unicorn who goes on a trip with his parents and does nothing the whole time but sit quietly in the backseat of the car and behave himself.” Travis’ father, Peter Ferland, declined to comment on the bedtime stories and instead asked if his son had been polite or “acted like a little shit” when talking with reporters.

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Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

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