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Sports

Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.

Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?
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Colin Kaepernick Admits He Learned Nothing From Watching Alex Smith Play Quarterback

SAN FRANCISCO—Coming off his second straight win as 49ers quarterback, Colin Kaepernick admitted to reporters Thursday that watching Alex Smith over the past two years has not helped his game in the slightest. “I wish I could say Alex has been an inspiration to me and all that, but I’ve watched the guy play 27 games now, and honest to God, I didn’t get a single thing out of it,” said Kaepernick, who added that seeing the 8-year veteran in practice and in games has taught him nothing about staying cool in the pocket, reading defenses, improvising when protection breaks down, or leadership either on or off the field. “I guess the only thing I did learn was how to completely fall apart during a conference championship game. That and how to rely on a great running back and phenomenal defense to win games for you. Otherwise, it was pretty much useless.” Kaepernick confirmed that his greatest learning experience since entering the league came while watching Eli Manning play against the 49ers.

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