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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Nauseatingly Precious NYC Couples To Walk Around In Rain

The Onion Weather Center looks at New York City where heavy rain causes obnoxious loving couples to come out and walk around the city like a bunch of assholes who have never seen rain before, and an impending blackout gives the city's working class its...

The Onion’s Fall TV Preview

Networks are just weeks away from debuting their Fall lineups, featuring both new shows and returning favorites. The Onion breaks down what to watch this Fall.

Most Anticipated Panels At Comic-Con

San Diego Comic-Con kicks off tomorrow, and this year’s schedule is packed with must-see events. Here are the most highly-anticipated panels of Comic-Con 2017.
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Comic Book Fans Adamant That Human Torch Be Played By Actor Whose Body Actually Engulfed In Flames

WASHINGTON—Expressing their frustration with the casting for the new Fantastic Four film, comic book fans across the country were reportedly adamant Monday that the superhero the Human Torch should be played by an actor who is actually engulfed in flames. “They should have stayed true to the original comics and selected an actor whose entire body is on fire,” said longtime Fantastic Four fan Barry Reich, criticizing filmmakers for casting Michael B. Jordan, who, unlike the comic book version of the Human Torch, is not enveloped from head to toe in flames. “Hollywood screwed up big time. It makes no sense for Susan Storm’s younger brother, Johnny, to be played by a non-ignited man. Since 1963, the Human Torch has always been able to generate powerful streams of flames and fireballs, and to ignore that is insulting to Fantastic Four creators Stan Lee and Jack Kirby.” Comic book fans, however, reportedly commended Fantastic Four director Josh Trank’s bold choice to cast a hyper-intelligent actor with multiple scientific doctorates and an elastic body as Mister Fantastic.


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